Note To An Ex

 history, honesty, my lovers  No Responses »
May 012013
 

I wrote this in January or February to an ex-lover, for his birthday. It went unanswered, as I suspected it would. —– I hope this email finds you well. I hope your New Birthday Year yields pleasant memories, challenges met, puzzles solved, and a sense of growth. My 2012 was intense, and ended with a series of difficult question marks. My January has, unbelievably, resolved into a series of affirmations in a way that makes me suspect, yet again, that my life has been edited for continuity and thematic consistency. I continue to fantasize, as I have since I met you, that you’ll show up at my door one day, unannounced. There aren’t a lot of happy reasons on your side to cause that to [read more...]

Becoming a Kinky Presenter

 attention whore, aural, BDSM, kinkster, me giving advice, phone sex  No Responses »
Apr 302013
 

Did I happen to mention that I was a presenter at Beat Me in St Louis in March? The class was “Phone Sex and Distance BDSM”. The way I got the gig was to write the organizers and say approximately “I’m willing to present free if you need an awkward slot filled.” Saturday morning 9 am after a late dungeon party? You betcha! So I put together a list of classes I’m willing to teach. I’m sure I’ll be updating it, but I wanted to remember how it started. * Distance BDSM and Phone Sex * Kinky Ice Breaker Game: “Choose An Offer” * Hosting Play Parties * Basic BDSM Safety & Negotiations 1. Distance BDSM and Phone Sex – sharing my experiences, ideas, mistakes, [read more...]

Coercion Play

 confession, kinkster, manipulation, role play  No Responses »
Apr 112013
 
Coercion Play

My Coercion Role Play at Kinky Kollege Spring Break 2013 The names have been changed so I can blog anonymously, but if you wish to identify yourself, please do! To fully understand what transpired, and still remain anonymous, I’m going to alter some historical details of my life: I’m going to pretend that I used to be involved in the data mining industry before I got debilitating vertigo (I wasn’t, but it was a similar technical industry), and I’m going to pretend that I did a data mining presentation at a conference which was heard by Christian Rudder of OKCupid’s awesome data-mining blog (I didn’t, but someone at least that influential in my actual industry did hear me speak), and that Christian not only said [read more...]

Kinky Christian Slut

 christianity, kinkster, slut  No Responses »
Mar 312013
 

Hi. My name is Angela, or Galiana, or PlaySmart, depending on the context, and I’m a Kinky Christian Slut. I think it’s time to admit it. Out loud. Here on my blog, which purports to be about my life, and yet, has remained heretofore silent on the topic of my religious beliefs. My Christianity is clearly non-traditional, utterly different than the Christianity portrayed in most 21st century American mass media, very complicated to explain, and deeply personal to me. It’s Easter today, a big deal in my Christianity. So to help me contemplate, I looked up the words that moved me to first truly commit myself to following Christ. It was Winter Quarter 1989. I was in a comparative religion class. Our textbook was then [read more...]

The Awesome Island of Misfit Toys

 honesty, issues, kinkster, phone sex, safety  No Responses »
Mar 302013
 

Written for friends on FetLife, where it made it to “Kinky & Popluar”, which meant a lot of people read it and commented and clicked “love” for it. It started some cool conversations. It was fun. —– At a public kinkster event yesterday, I had a thoughtful conversation with a couple of people about their social anxieties, and found out later that two people had chosen to leave the event due to anxieties. Each person’s circumstances and triggers and other contributing factors were different, of course, but I’ve been mulling, so I thought I’d write. Indulge me for a moment, and mentally roll the issue of kinkster gatherings and social anxieties WAY back in time to the moment when any of these people admitted to [read more...]

50, 30, and The Identity Exercises

 birthday, celebration, me giving advice, phone sex  No Responses »
Mar 292013
 

Here’s another one I wrote for some friends on Fet —– I have a good friend turning 30 soon, a good friend turning 30 soon-ish, and a good friend turning 50 soon. Got me to thinking. When I was in college, I was in therapy for family reasons, a theater major “because I learn more about what it is to be a human through stories than I do psychology or hard sciences” (that was my standard answer, and yes, I know it was pretentious), and heavily involved in a close-knit religious community which encouraged emotional honesty. So I basically thought about myself and my emotions ALL THE TIME. It sounds exhausting now, but obviously, it was what I needed then. Don’t judge. My religious wrestlings, [read more...]

Becoming Lady Angela / Staying PlaySmart

 honesty, name  No Responses »
Feb 022013
 
Becoming Lady Angela / Staying PlaySmart

I wrote this for friends on FetLife. It contains information bombs for blog readers: 1. My first name is Angela. 2. My username for my personal profile on FetLife is PlaySmart. When I was first starting phone sex, around my 40th birthday, I wrote about choosing the name Galiana, and whether or not Galiana is my real name in some sense. Along the way, I told a few callers my legal name, for various reasons. The guy I met real-time with sugar daddy tendencies. The first caller I told that I loved him, and from the same blog entry, the man who fell asleep to my voice for a while. The one who helped me start accepting my Inner Whore. The guy in a wheelchair [read more...]

Woman of Leisure

 daily, flirting, kinkster, vertigo  No Responses »
Jan 312013
 
Woman of Leisure

It’s been about seven months now since I felt like I was physically capable of sustaining a phone sex call in a manner worthy of charging for it. My current neurological makeup seems to favor activities which provide a lot of joy, but require very little concentration, and if either of those aren’t true, I run out of steam quickly. Writing for this blog has been oddly difficult as well. There are stories I want to tell, but I haven’t been able to figure out how to tell them here. I write things on FetLife, for my in-flesh kinkster friends who have become my community and local family of choice. Some day I’ll figure out how to translate them here as well. I was talking [read more...]

First Stand Up

 attention whore, celebration, feet, funny stories, self-amusement, standup comedy, videos  No Responses »
Jan 312013
 

I happened to be at an open mic for stand-up, so I decided to try my hand. I’ve suspected I wouldn’t be horrible at it, and sure enough, it wasn’t horrible (except for about 45 seconds near the beginning, which I edited out). Enjoy And if anybody feels like transcribing it so I can have the whole text of it at the end of this blog post, please feel free to do so and send it to me.  

Becoming The Answer

 birthday, celebration, my lovers  No Responses »
Dec 022012
 
Becoming The Answer

I turned 42 this year, which means I am now The Answer to the Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe, and Everything (follow the link for the geeky reference). So for my birthday party, I gathered a few local kinkster friends with a very specific set of criteria: I had to believe they wanted good things for me I had to believe they would not be offended or bothered by sexual play (many kinksters, especially BDSM players, only play with pain outside their primary relationship, but they don’t include overtly sexual acts) I had to believe they would say “no” to my request if they were uncomfortable in any way (not everyone will) I had to believe they would enjoy running their hands over my [read more...]

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